damn!!! been feeling so not me lately

I don't know how long it has been since I last blogged.but I guess because tomorrow is monday and akan ade five really really long days before I could terbungkang atas katil macam hari ni dan semalam, I might as well used this fabulous but  fleeting time untuk menghasilkan karya masterpiece.Bukannya ade benda nak buat macam study ke, finishkan assigments ke kan kan kan? (Tengok tu dah sarcastic habis dah and yet still xnak study)

things that I have endured this last three weeks :

I) Finally dapat  kolej lepas 2 minggu merempat bilik org.

II) Keluar dengan org I met on the internet, and found out how worried my mom got when I told her about   it.  alah bukannya siapa pun budak UiTM jugak, and how negative she really is in person, tapi takpe kawan  jugak kan..

III) First time buat proposal

IV) are now working with three boys finishing an english report. Sometimes, they... well how to put this into words... THEY SUCK. Tapi mungkin they WILL GET BETTER. AMIN.... (Untuk setiap sesuatu ade sebab kenapa TUHAN BUAT MACAM TU,just like there are reasons why God want me to work with boys who let me do all the work)  Hopefully they are WORKING ON THEIR PARTS. Dahlah kelas every MONDAY MORNING, let's just say my weekends dah tak mcm weekeds dah. Dahlah BI is my favourite subject... dush dush (hammer sikit kepala ni)

if I were a depressed anime character on monday morning, this would be me..

                                                   

IT HAS BEEN THREE WEEKS that I have not attended debate class. I think I'm now DEAD inside..

This is me...  dead inside

BARU TIGA MINGGU BEB, ni pun lab belum start lagi... yet still tak study ape-ape lagi (sem ni lambat sikit azam nak study datang, with me merempat and all that. tapi sekarang dah dapat bilik pun tak study lagi... asyik tgk family guy je... apahal ni ...)

So this is all for now, I don't know why but I've been so depressed lately... actually I do know why. Tapi lain kali punya cerita...

makan roti bercicahkan air paya...

I am the type of girl yg tidak akan masuk paya, no matter how much you would want to pay me.

dan jenis yg tidak akan boleh langkah longkang yg tingginya satu kaki lebih dan lebar nya setengah kaki.

But last week I did things that I thought I would never do. Salah satunya adelah tajuk tu

Kita org buat the following things

a) berendam dalam air paya nak dekat dua jam tgh-tgh malam (org kate sejuk but I think it is quite warm)

b)lepas tu tido atas tar setengah jam ( x bleh tido pun)

c) lepas tu night walk

d) start off  berjalan atas tali to cross another swamp. May I say that, kitalah yg paling lambat but no matter. what matters is that , I DID IT. me. org yg sgt penakut nak langkah longkang.  I DID IT. lebih kurang macam ni but there is a swamp below.  and no harness.

e) then ade makhluk hitam dan putih menunggu disebalik semak, dahlah I'm the type yg senang lemah smgt.

f) then ade game yg melibatkan kita crawling in mud. Takdelah geli sgt main dalam mud bila malam-malam, I guess kita akan kurang geli bila kita tak nampak ape yg kita sentuh.

Did I mention that our bags are taken away dan hanya dibenarkan bawak 2 tshirt, 2 seluar, satu kasut sukan before the whole thing started pakaian dalam yg secukupnya. So no perfume, no talcum powder, and no deodorant you can imagine how much we stink on wednesday. Not that it matters, bukannya sempat mandi pun, sempat siram air je dan kena mandi sama-sama lak tu. Did I mention dalam 4 hari tu kita org tido mungkin 7-8 jam je total? Patutlah by Wednesday badan rase mcm kena Parkinson. 

Tapi, I gotta say the food is awesome, not because we are hungry, but it truly is delicious, we ate like 6 times a day,. Ade ikan bakar, ade nasi ayam, ada ayam goreng, ade nasi lemak sambal sotong , ade ikan goreng yg kita tercekik tulang  for almost two hours.  My only regret is mase tidak mencukupi untuk menikmati makan, mase untuk makan 5-7 minit je.

And this is only part of things that we have to go through untuk menjadi SEORANG FASILITATOR YG BERJAYA  (boleh lebih POYO tak?)

I gotta say the training really lives up to its name Training of Trainers, so untuk menjadi seorang TRAINER kenalah kuat PHYSICAL MENTAL DAN KUAT dari segi EMOSI.  I guess it makes me braver and a much more confident person than I was before I went for TOT. Selain drpd it is extremely fun, dan yg paling penting ia mencapai matlamat.

So hopefully, my participitation in KEFAJAR will be a beneficial one, both for me and for KEFAJAR itself.

to drive?, not to drive? (a story of balance)

I like how my mom and dad balance each other out. Like ying and yang, night and day, and bla and bla, you got the idea right?

It started when I  drove (I haven't been driving for months) last week. Bukan pergi mane pun, pergi pasar tani je. It was hillarious to see how different my mom and dad reacted.

my mom: bawak lesen tak tadi? enjen mati tak? ngenges tak kereta?

my dad: he didn't say anything accept few questions how I drove, but I know deep down he was super proud of me. he....he

The same thing happened again yesterday and today.

I have mentioned yesterday, that I will be driving by myself pergi pasar tani hari ni, because my dad will be out working.

Yesterday before I went to bed my mom cakap : 

Esok jangan gi mane mane tau, duk rumah kang ape-ape jadi susah.

so being a firm believer of "ketulahan" (something bad will happen to me If I don't do as she says) so I decided not to.

But today my dad was in my room three times:

Ist  time : hari ni ko drive elok2 tau. Ingat formula driving (driving ade formula ye?)

2nd time :  pagi-pagi kereta susah nak start tau, start dulu kereta tunggu lima minit baru ko drive.

3rd time: ade duit tak?(3x) ayah tinggal 50 kat bawah phone tu.

terase mcm that peribahasa : yang ditelan mati bapak and diluah mati.. well you know the saying

so In order not to dissapoint my dad and menyebabkan ketulahan from my mom:

I call my  mom and tell her this: "Ayah nak org drive tu, siap bagi duit lagi tu siap suruh ingat formula lagi... kalo ade ape2 org call lah ok?"

 My mom, being a mom she's being her cranky self said "kalo ko call pun mami tak tolong" 

So I drove, I mean  he gave me 50 bucks just to go to the market, he's practically pushing me into the car right?

So that's  the story of how my mom and dad complement one another. Till next time...

things I (by I, I mean my mom, dad and me) and when I have worms up my nose

wow!! two posts in one night, sometimes I even amazed myself. 

And, no I don't have worms up my nose, that's gross. My mum has been bugging me to see a doctor about my sneezes, which I've been having since : I don't know, a few years, but not all the time.  just when my nose decides to be extra sensitive on that particular time.

And the no life thing : that is sadly true. Since I lack a boyfriend, I have a best friend in which her two phones coincidentally are shut off when I want to ask her to go out with me (I know she's working, but she can't be working for 24 hours, come on..) and when I'm home I don't go out much (when you're a student and have no money you have to stay home)

So I have all these things planned out:

a) study mandarin for next semester

b) do a lot of reading for debate club and find who the Roma's are..

( dua-dua pun belum buat lagi)

c) do an art project (did that last cuti)

d) lost weight (ni dah start, tapi I've been eating a lot these days...)

e) buy a phone (my current phone does not allow me to speak to it for more than 30 seconds at a time without shutting off automatically: it is soooo advanced, I know )

Things my my mom planned out for me :

a) go see the doctor

b) learn to knit???

c) learn to cross stitch???

things my dad planned out for me:

a)"you should take the car out for a drive.." 

this was however cleverly refuted by my mom" belum bawak kereta keluar lagi dia dah accident.

 that's the only thing my dad has for me actually

things I didn't plan but did them anyways:

a) posted an ad on a dating site

b) texting with an unknown person from the dating site

c) buat aktiviti yg sgt sihat kat internet.

Bila, I'm bored, I found out, that I'm capable of doing things I do not do on normal days

Thank god, for KEFAJAR training course : TOT : Training of Trainers from 13th-16th, why can't it last longer?...

so those are the things I have planned for me... so till next time..

MONEY and CNY

Dah 4 hari dah Chinese New Year, so happy Chinese New Year!!! 

There are plenty of things I like about CNY but the loud fireworks isn't one of them,although I don't have to get up for school the next day, tapi my dad kena bangun awal pagi sebab kena gi kerja. dahlah tak tentu pukul berapa kerja kadang-kadang pukul 2, kadang-kadang pukul 8.

Things I like about CNY are

a) my mom tries to be closer to her chinese roots and supersitions ( namely, tak boleh bersihkan rumah or basuh rambut on the day of CNY which is sangat menyusahkan bila dah tiga hari tak basuh rambut)

b)In reference to a) I wake up with an angpow from my mom dalam pillow case this year I got 10 bucks

c)more money : I got three angpows from the neighbour across my house, di mana the value of each angpow is yet to be determined. (please refer to the me-if-I-was-in-a-hot cheongam-outfit-drawing)

d)my mom cook these well Golden balls : di mana  mami buat bola-bola (mcm fishball) daripada tepung beras , dan suruh makan for good fortune she says. biarpun kurang sedap, but I appreciate her effort.

e) and of course funny old chinese movies yg jarang dah di mainkan di tv which is in cantonese which is weird because most Chinese in Malaysia speak mandarin.

Plus, not to mention the 200 bucks worth of voucher in which the goverment has decided to give to all IPT's students untuk menarik... I kind of like the election year, senang nak dapat benda, no? 

Tapi a lot of things

yang tak sedap didengar, namely

- ada students yg dah last sem diorang jual voucher kat org lain, 

-boleh beli buku je  

-and kalo nak guna kena habiskan 50 ringgit tu, kalo tak voucher tu burn. 

my vouchers yg belum diguna

I did not think the goverment think things through bila diorg decide benda ni. 

Plus the silly things the bookstores are doing to try untuk menarik budak-budak pergi kedai diorang. 

As for me, I think I'm gonna buy an encyclopedia or something.

I hope this post isn't too boring or anything, I just know that I have to write something, sebab bila kita kat U I didn't write anything, and sangatlah mematikan jiwa.

So that is all for tonight... till these fingers menyentuh keyboard.

every ending is a sigh of relief...

Salam, it has been a while since I last blog.

I never would have thought doing a degree would be so time consuming, sampai that one time I told my roomate "rase mcm nak mati, nak mati boleh?" dia kata buat slow-slow, pelan-pelan. It just that, that last day of kuliah baru settle semua, all the tests, all exams all the assigments (It did not help, the fact that all three of my lecturers decided to give their assigments at the same time,dahlah dekat hujung-hujung sem, mase nak cari mase untuk study untuk final lak tu?) I was like a ticking time bomb yg ready to explode (please refer to the awesome picture below)

I didn't know how I did it, I certainly don't how I'm going to do it next semester. 

Perhaps it is the kejutan budaya that is caused by sudden jump daripada diploma yang idle terus kepada part  3 yg meranap dan mematahkan jiwa.

Anyways, alhamdulillah I got through it all, a lot of things have happened, I went through my konvekesyen caremony, (yeay me!!!) sibuk, letih tapi best gak la. reunited with a few friends. Dapat masuk KEFAJAR that was awesome, what else? ada jugak cerita lain yang reflects our Malaysian society and stories which shocked the hell out of me. 

Last but not least,

it is  great to be home,  being with my mom and my dad  and not to mention  my cats climbing on the dining table/ 'buat kerja' table,everytime I'm surfing or doing something on my laptop they will be kalo tak tepi laptop atas laptop.(see figure above)

There will be lots more stories to tell, but since I need to get some sleep (or my mom will softly and gently tell me to go bed), that will be all for tonight.

to change..

From the beginning of this semester I've promised that I'll change. 

I've promised my mum and me. 

I don't feel any change in myself, because I haven't yet seen the results.

Yes, I've joined debate , but it isn't official till I contributed or win smething for the club. I want to join KEFAJAR UiTM (kelab fasilitator).

the interview is tomorrow, I hope I won't be as devastated as I was when I did my interview for the tutoring job. I want to change my angle. Tomorrow during the interview I'll talk about change in myself and those who I want to help.

BTW, the change I've promised my mum and  me, is the changed for the better, BETTER GRADES that is, but employers want more than just GOOD GRADES right? They want SOFT SKILLS.

So I NEED GREAT GRADES AND GREAT SOFT SKILLS. How I'm supposed to do that? To be able to get all As and be very active in clubs and such?

Yes I don't feel any change, but I would like to believe I have changed, becoz hari tu kita cakap dgn my best friend (dia habis diploma lewat sebab extend) dia tanya kita how are things and such so I talk to her about debate and and stuff  dia cakap macam ni " aktifnya awak, awak punya pelajaran ok?" 

So mcm nganga jugak la soalan dia tanya mcm tu. I forgot how "kurang positivenya dia"

You see bila dia tak dapat sambung belajar sama dengan kita,  I feel devastated sebab dia dah xde, since she has been my comfort zone   I think  mcm ni , who I will I talk too, who I will do thing with ect ect. and I don't do a lot of things during my diploma because all  I think about is her. because I worry about her like all the time. She having one boyfriend after another somehow contributes to do that.

  tapi I feel glad that kita tak sambung same dgn kita, because I've got to meet REALLY GREAT POSITIVE PEOPLE, people who if she's around I know wouldn't be talking too. People who tell me YOU CAN , IF YOU BELIEVE  and IF YOU WORK HARD FOR IT.

so have I changed? have my grades changed for the better, I don't know, simply because belum exam lagi.. But those around me have changed, and I hope I have too. Amin

Betullah SETIAP YANG TUHAN BUAT ADA SEBABNYA. Esok ade test dua btw.... hope I'm changed enough to know to study when I need to.