From the beginning of this semester I've promised that I'll change.
I've promised my mum and me.
I don't feel any change in myself, because I haven't yet seen the results.
Yes, I've joined debate , but it isn't official till I contributed or win smething for the club. I want to join KEFAJAR UiTM (kelab fasilitator).
the interview is tomorrow, I hope I won't be as devastated as I was when I did my interview for the tutoring job. I want to change my angle. Tomorrow during the interview I'll talk about change in myself and those who I want to help.
BTW, the change I've promised my mum and me, is the changed for the better, BETTER GRADES that is, but employers want more than just GOOD GRADES right? They want SOFT SKILLS.
So I NEED GREAT GRADES AND GREAT SOFT SKILLS. How I'm supposed to do that? To be able to get all As and be very active in clubs and such?
Yes I don't feel any change, but I would like to believe I have changed, becoz hari tu kita cakap dgn my best friend (dia habis diploma lewat sebab extend) dia tanya kita how are things and such so I talk to her about debate and and stuff dia cakap macam ni " aktifnya awak, awak punya pelajaran ok?"
So mcm nganga jugak la soalan dia tanya mcm tu. I forgot how "kurang positivenya dia"
You see bila dia tak dapat sambung belajar sama dengan kita, I feel devastated sebab dia dah xde, since she has been my comfort zone I think mcm ni , who I will I talk too, who I will do thing with ect ect. and I don't do a lot of things during my diploma because all I think about is her. because I worry about her like all the time. She having one boyfriend after another somehow contributes to do that.
tapi I feel glad that kita tak sambung same dgn kita, because I've got to meet REALLY GREAT POSITIVE PEOPLE, people who if she's around I know wouldn't be talking too. People who tell me YOU CAN , IF YOU BELIEVE and IF YOU WORK HARD FOR IT.
so have I changed? have my grades changed for the better, I don't know, simply because belum exam lagi.. But those around me have changed, and I hope I have too. Amin
Betullah SETIAP YANG TUHAN BUAT ADA SEBABNYA. Esok ade test dua btw.... hope I'm changed enough to know to study when I need to.
